My Book Festival Timeline (DAY I), or How I Will Become Best Friends With Barack Obama

This is a good time for me to acknowledge that I am in no way affiliated with the Texas Book Festival and that my intent is not to defame this lovely festival or its participants. Additionally, the Texas Book Festival and its sponsors are not responsible for or represented by the comments expressed on this blogotron. That said, I will calls 'em as I sees 'em. For instance, if I see any of the following...

• drunk authors vomiting in the streets


• the Texas Writers League looting and rioting


• Barnes and Noble employees eating babies


• Amy Sedaris and Tavis Smiley arm wrestling

...I'm going to take pictures and relay to you, in the most exquisite prose, my impressions. It is my belief that between events I will bear witness to things both remarkable and mundane.

Here is my plan...

DAY 1, Saturday, October 29


• 10AM - See Barack Obama. Try to become his friend.


• 11AM - Attend panel discussion Literary Nonfiction: Telling the Truth with Style, possibly lament not attending Go Girl: Hot Books For Cool Girls.


• 12Noon - Try to catch the conclusion of 2006 O. Henry Prize Short Stories thing.


• 12:15PM - Weep gently while watching discussion of Memoirs Dealing with Dad.


• 1PM - Roam the grounds of the Capitol suspiciously with sandwich.


• 2PM - Cooking Tent: Amy Sedaris.


• 3PM - Getting serious: State of the Union: Politics in America, two Dowds, a Lemann, and a Navasky = Trouble!

More to come...